so you think you can dance?

I get a weekly astrology e-mail from Rob Brezny that I take in certain doses of seriousness (depending on my mood, etc.). But this week's actually resonated in a way that had me reading it over again a few times:

CANCER (June 21-July 22): I'm not a big fan of the "No Pain, No Gain"
school of thought. Personally, I have drummed up more marvels and
wonders through the power of rowdy bliss than I have from hauling
thousand-pound burdens across the wasteland. But I do recognize that in
my own story as well as in others', hardship can sometimes provoke
inspiration. I think it may be one of those moments for you, Cancerian.
Please accept this medicinal prod from the ancient Roman poet Horace:
"Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents that in times of prosperity
would have lain dormant."

While I'm not living in the land of deep adversity at present, I am in a mode of needing to unearth some talents that I wasn't sure I had. A lot of it is beginning again/facing challenges that are a bit unnerving.

I started a new job and while it's happily working a part of my writing/organizational brain that's lain dormant for awhile (ok, actually i'm also excavating a part of my brain that's never been used: namely the left side having to do with medical terms and such), I also realize how impatient I am regarding my own learning curve, basically that i only give myself about an hour before i think i should have it all down. It's like i know logically that's an outrageous demand, somehow my ego thinks i'm different and capable of superhero-like immediate intelligence.

So, there's that. Then there's also this moment with my book proposal: the agent I contacted is awesome and giving me good notes on what to do in order to give the overview and chapters the most punch so publishers will say YES, let's buy this idea and have this woman write the book. The thing is...i hate rewriting because somehow i think of it as having to...yes, start again. (Even though i realize revisiting is really more what's going on. Reworking. Remodeling. Reaffixing.) Again, my ego says What? it's not perfect the first time? Well, no, it's not.

In other movement: I'm taking a class taught by one of my favorite people, and she's kicking my ass. Breaking down moves that i kind of thought i knew but realize i'd fallen into a habit of laziness with, and i'm surprised at how resistant my body has gotten about correcting. I've had moments where i thought Did I ever know how to execute this spin correctly in the first place? At the S studio, I'm also in a new place, and that's a lovely challenge on a whole other level to do with honesty and rawness.

There's new territory being forged with mi honey. And the heart-land is a place that scares me like no other. it's a landscape so totally foreign to me (read: trust, patience, resting in each other's arms) that it's like starting a new language. Even if we're learning it together, it's still a surprise.

I'm getting that life is always about the flexibility and willingness to grow, move through things, take the learning, leave behind the stucked-ness. Start again. Right now, although it seems that everything's rolling at once, i know there's a rhythm to it. It's just me slowing down and appreciating, paying attention to, the steps. not being afraid to do a little cha-cha-cha.

I'm including a video (see above) by my favorite dancers choreographed by a woman who I think brings the challenge of movement like no other: Jacoby and Pronk with Mia Michaels. (also recently posted on one of my other favorite blogs: Arial Amy)